Ask any of my friends and they will tell you that I am a closet Kardashians fan, or I guess that fact that it is common knowledge amongst my friendship group means that maybe ‘closet’ is no longer an adjective that applies. But whilst my love of watching the odd omnibus endures, and my knowledge of their outfits and going-ons is thorough, one thing I am not a huge fan of is Kanye, and I am even more disapproving of his involvement in fashion. Granted, he may have a creative streak and if I were in his shoes I too may have a stab at the fashion world, after all, it does look fun and glamorous. But, in all honesty, his attempt at slotting in alongside heritage French couture houses and some of the brightest (and hard-working) sparks in the industry seems a little try-hard, and insincere. The fact that Kanye is also in the process of planning a presidential campaign means I can’t help but wonder whether Kanye and his inflated ego are under the impression that money and celebrity status can buy votes, both fashion and political.
But let’s pretend for just one moment that we don’t know who Kanye is, because after all, I don’t want prejudice to blur my judgement. Let’s just pretend that Kanye is an unknown fashion graduate who has scraped together some pennies to show his first collection, and was blissfully unaware of the politics that come into play when planning (and then subsequently clashing) the fashion week schedule.
The show consisted of a drained colour palette of pallid nude, the peachy colour that belongs to cheap mannequins and prosthetic limbs. Baggy sweatshirts similar to those donned by the man himself on a regular basis were presented in full force along with high-waisted nude tights, leggings, and body suits. I guess we can credit Kanye for sending us on a nostalgic trip down memory lane, back to the days when we watched What Not To Wear and giggled at the sight of women wrapped head to toe in nude Spanx and shape forming underwear like plucked chickens awaiting a good dressing.
Looking beyond the nude body stockings and you get utility jackets in faded clay, khaki trousers, boots, and more distressed Fruit Of The Loom style hoodies. All they needed was the date and a never ending list of small-print names of classmates, a list which will become fuel for a day of Facebook-stalking and recollection of teenage years and geography trips to the Lake District. Maybe this is in fact what happened to Kanye’s collection, maybe the sludgy brown was thanks to a subterranean layer of clay that was encountered wearing his leavers hoodie back in the day.
Whilst some of these items could be styled up to add a scruffy edge to an outfit (a look I do actually have a penchant for, anything too polished is a no no), in reality though you will just look like Kanye, and that isn’t a look I want to channel.